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Dating your friends best friend
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Friends dating friends can be awesome. It makes for easy double dates and you get to take all the credit OK, most of the credit for their fabulous relationship. There is one dangerous trap that comes with this matchmaking title, and that is the pitfall of Dating your friends best friend the Relationship Middle Man. Before you know it, each of them are sending you screenshots of their text conversations and asking you what he meant, asking you if she is mad at him, and a million other annoying insecurities. Yes, in a way, you may be helping one friend by confirming that he is definitely over his ex Dating your friends best friend that he is really, truly, into her.
One of the best parts about relationships is getting to learn about the other person for yourself. If either party talks to you about a problem, just listen. Both of these people are your friends, and if a problem arises in their relationship, they may want to vent to you or seek out advice. You also know the other person so well, after all. Let them rant about the other person without judgement, as they are in a different relationship with your friend than you are. You are not in a place to make decisions for them. After you listen, remain neutral.
It may be tempting to secretly or not so secretly side with one friend due to being friends longer, ovaries before brovaries, etc. Unless one party has done something particularly horrible or abusive, be Switzerland. Wave your white flag and stay out of the fight. In particular, couples now expect their relationships to promote personal growth and help individuals fulfill their own goals. For example, your partner should help you become a better person by teaching you new things like how to make the perfect creme brulee, taking you places like the cool new trampoline park and opening your eyes to new perspectives such as the benefits of eating a more vegetarian-based diet.
Although this expectation for growth could conceivably place an unwieldy burden on your relationship, researchers believe that modern relationships are up to the task.
The ground rules when your two good friends start dating
In fact, yoour idea that a friene can help an individual become a Datinv person, a phenomenon that researchers call self-expansionis a useful one; relationships that provide more expansion are also of higher quality. In order to hit all these self-improvement targets, you may need more from a spouse or romantic partner than was expected in years past — and a partner who is also your best friend may be a step in the right direction. Think of it this way: Are best-friend partners better partners? We wanted to see if these best-friend romances were really better. This finding is consistent with research showing that relationships with more companionate love — based on friendship, feelings of affection, comfort and shared interests — last longer and are more satisfying.
Other research shows that those in friendship-based love relationships feel they have a highly likable partner, and that shared companionship is an important part of the love. A study of married individuals revealed that those with higher scores on the friendship-based love scale also reported more relationship satisfaction, greater perceived importance of the relationship, greater respect for their Dating your friends best friend, and felt closer to their spouse. More recently, across two studies with nearly participants in relationships, those who place more value on the friendship aspect of their relationship also report more commitment, more love and greater sexual gratification. In addition, valuing friendship also decreased the chances of the couple breaking up.
Best-friend love is starting to sound better and better. All of these benefits are backed up by accounts from a special type of relationship expert: When researchers asked over of these couples about their secret to relationship success and longevity, what was the number one reason? The second most common response was liking their spouse as a person, another key facet of friendship-based love. Why you like someone as a friend may be what makes them a great romantic partner. Couple image via www. Why are best-friend partners so beneficial?
These findings demonstrating the benefits of dating or marrying your best friend make perfect sense when you consider the type of relationship best friends share.